Stacey Hensby - Brand Ambassador
Hi, I’m Stacey!
As a brand ambassador for YANA, I really want to use this opportunity to share my story and help others understand that having a mental illness does not define them. If I can help just one person by sharing my story, then I will be over the moon.
I used to suffer from depression when I was younger and when I fell pregnant with my daughter my biggest fear was to be diagnosed with postnatal depression because I believed it would mean I would be incapable of looking after my child.
When my beautiful little girl, Scarlett, was born there were a few complications so I had to have an assisted birth. I also wasn’t able to breastfeed her and after always hearing that breastfeeding was the best thing to do for a baby, I started to feel like a failure as the one thing I thought my body should be able to do, couldn’t.
In my mind, I was trying so hard to avoid postnatal depression by keeping everyone happy and trying to do everything myself, although I had and still do have amazing support from my partner. I started feeling pressure when others offered to look after Scarlett and I just didn’t feel ready. When Scarlett would cry, that feeling of being a failure would set in and it would trigger my depression.
My mood started to get worse and I began to get angry with my partner, I started to feel very out of control and have panic attacks. So after a few weeks of feeling like this, I decided to talk to my doctors about my feelings and was prescribed anti-depressants. I felt defeated and upset with myself as I knew they were going to tell me I had postnatal depression and in my mind at the time, that diagnosis would mean I was weak. After being diagnosed, I decided to not tell anyone apart from my mum, partner and best friend as I felt that I would be judged and others would think I was incapable of looking after my child.
I felt so much better after talking to the closet people around me and I felt back in control of the situation. I would tell myself that it was ok if I wasn’t ready to do things and to just take one step at a time. I also found that writing things down, making lists - no matter how big or small, and cleaning has been a great help with my depression. It helps me to have a routine, having something I do the same every day; even if it’s just walking to the shop to get out the house or phoning someone to tell them I’m having a good or bad day.
Scarlett is the happiest little girl and this reminds me every day that my illness does not define me. I am proud of myself for finally getting the support I needed and that I am now feeling strong enough to share my story. I hope that by sharing my story it will help others who might be feeling similar and also encourage them to seek support if they are suffering in silence.
I still have bad days but I know now that it is absolutely ok to feel this way - postnatal depression is not a weakness and I/you shouldn’t be ashamed of it <3
Fancy joining us in spreading the word and beating the stigma? You can use Stacey’s exclusive discount code ‘STACEY10’ in the our Etsy shop to save yourself 10% across all items - even sale items!
